Inbetween

I've decided I miss the stage of being inbetween dating and not. My sister Sarah (the one inthe middle) is turning 16 in 9 days, and is in that very place. She likes this boy ever so much and he has definitely taken an interest in her. Sarah, was the child that swore she would never have a boyfriend or go on dates like I did. She said that boys were over rated and immature. I kept trying to tell her that it would happen to her eventually, and that I had similar view at her age. Now I am proven right, but admit I am slightly jealous at the position she is in. Right now she is in the stage where dating is new and exciting. There is no pressure, just fun...no expectations, just excitement. You know how it feels, when you get to hold someone's hand for the first time, and aren't sure what will happen next. It's an incredible feeling, and it's something I feel like I'm missing out on now.

I'm sure it doesn't have to be that way, but I feel like as you get older, it's easier to move into more of a committed relationship, more quickly. Who cares about holding hands when making out is more fun? Who needs to talk when there's tongue involved right? That is the attitude most people around me seem to have. I just want to get excited about the preliminary stages and be able to stay in that fun stage for a little bit longer when I'm in a relationship. I sort of feel like if a guy can let us stay in that place he's definitely worth sticking around for! There isn't a rush with me.

A Good Catch??

I have this image in my mind of the perfect one for me. Now granted, he's constantly changing as I meet more people with qualities I'm looking for, but I think it's safe to say that I have a general idea of what I want. You're probably reading this thinking I'm entirely too picky and I'll never find him...but let me enlighten you as to how I've become this way.

This process of putting together my "perfect guy" started about age 7, the year I decided that I was going to marry Prince Eric from The Little Mermaid. He was soooo dreamy, and who else could sail a sunken ship and stab Ursula while simultaneously electricuting her? I'm telling you he was a catch! Eric was quickly followed by Dmitri from Anastasia and Prince Phillip, and as I got older, Justin Timberlake (my preteen phase) and Shawn Hunter (from Boy Meets world.)
Eventually, I moved out of this "fictional" phase (though I'm still pining for Brad Pitt, George Clooney and James Marsden) and into "real life" dating. In junior high when I "went out" with boys I found out really quickly how stupid they can be. I learned right away that holding hands is super important, and that if it makes you uncomfortable, it's the wrong person's hand you're holding. Thank you Logan. Next there was David who showed me that I'm a flirt and can't date a jealous boy. There was pizza throwing involved... :) David was followed by Lee, my almost boyfriend who was probably the nicest guy to date. He was the one who helped me realize that I needed I guy to take charge in a relationship. (nothing happened because he didn't) but he also showed me that I needed someone I could talk to, and get excited about being around. Lee was followed by a slew of very random, and short lived crushes, until John. He helped me understand that guys don't know what they want, so they try to date a lot of girls to figure it out. John's problem was that he dated them all at once. Oops.
My first real boyfriend was Steve, and I believe he was the only one who taught me all the good things, nothing bad. He taught me how to meet people, how to laugh, how to take risks, how to be honest. Long story short, since him I've dated Spencer, work jerk with an attitude who never called, and BJ the cheater.
So the point I'm trying to make is that through all my experiences I've figured out what I want. The problem therefore, is that I keep having people tell me what I want and that I'm to picky, but really, isn't it better that I know what I want? Won't that save me and everyone else a lot of heartache? People keep trying to set me up and wonder why I don't like who they choose, but ultimately it is up to me right?

How many ways can you say entrancing?

Okay, So I don't know how many of you have seen the movie "Dear Frankie," but I watched it last night and became entranced in the absolute beauty of the movie. Have you ever watched something and became momentarily breathless? This is how this movie made me feel. Honestly, tears came to my eyes, and not because the movie was sad at all but because I was captivated by it. The last time I was this mystified about what I watched in a movie was the first time I saw Elizabethtown. Words, storylines, characters, actors...forgettable. The film's ability to pull you in by it's cinematography alone is what makes it memorable. This along with music, can create an image the viewer never forgets. (as you can probably figure out, I highly recommend this movie.)
Watching this movie was a perfect escape from the rest of the world. Right now my life consists of playing mom to a family of 5 kids while their parents are out of town. Unfortunately this family isn't the Cleavers, so they have a set of problems and stresses all their own. It's hard to come in unaware of the issues and feel comfortable in an environment like that. So let's just say the escape was a welcome one.
On a lighter note...wait does anyone have a lighter note?

Yawns and other such news...

Do we yawn because we're tired? I guess scientists say it's because we aren't getting enough oxygen to our brains. I'm not sure how we could stop getting enough oxygen, I mean, we're breathing aren't we? So why have I begun to yawn so consistently at work. Unfortunately, people seem to think I am sleep deprived or bored. I say neither. In all of the instances in which I have yawned I have never once felt super sleepy, and am usually quite interested in what the other person had to say. And yet, they still came, a group of yawns in spades.

In other news....Megan is now home for the summer. What essentially made me more excited than anything up at school, was the fact that summer was coming. It's what got me through finals. However, since I've been home I've wanted nothing more than to move back to Logan. I mean don't get me wrong I love being at home, it's just that there is a such a feeling of empowerment being on your own and now that I'm here, that feeling has started to decline. Now, it's a new sort of feeling, one that I'm not quite used to having yet. Also, what are the rules for living at home now anyhow? Do I ask my parents permission to go out with friends or do I just tell them I'm going out? What is my curfew? Do I even have a curfew? Can I bring friends over to the house, or not? These are things I had no problem dealing with in Logan because I made the choices. But now I'm living with my parents...have the rules changed?